For the past 8 years, I’ve traveled all around. I left Kansas City, MO and ended up in Washington DC. In between, I’ve lived and explored Europe and I visited Asia....if you call that visiting. I’ve moved about 7 times. I have purposely avoided any type of substantial consistency.
In my current situation, I live-in-sin with my boyfriend of 3 years, and we have been in our apartment for TWO YEARS!!! <insert collective gasp here>
Our lease is coming to an end, and I am ready to get the heck out of here. Don’t get me wrong, I really like where I live. I have a pedestrian lifestyle and the luxury apartment complex isn’t too shabby either. I have no reason to complain about my living situation. It’s everything one could want in the DC area, including washer/dryer in-unit.....which is apparently UNHEARD of.
So why do I want to move?
Why can’t I get away from this nomadic existence I have created for myself?
Well, I like moving. I like starting over. I like change. I like finding a new neighborhood to explore. It’s exhilarating.
But, am I getting too old for this??? I’m almost the big 3-0, dear reader. Shouldn’t I be acting more like a grown-up?
I have multiple friends who are married, have kids, and pay on a mortgage. <again, gasp!> I have some friends who are having kids on purpose!!!
Am I suppose to want all of this too??? Should I be establishing roots somewhere? Should discussion of the “M” word be in our conversations?? <insert screaming here>
Maybe I’m just too immature. Maybe I’m not ready to “settle down” and be a real person, or maybe I’m not ready to be a grown-up.
I don’t know what I’m suppose to do. I don’t even know what society says I should do - yes, even society has conflicting ideas. All I know is that I really enjoy change. I like the unknown. Being comfortable, while very nice, becomes boring. I’m so afraid of becoming stagnant in my own life that I think I over-compensate by constantly engaging in some type of new activity.
What do you think?? Am I too old to have a nomadic lifestyle? Should I “settle down” and start being establishing roots? Or, should I keep going in this direction and see where I end up?
P.S. If you have ideas on how to proactively make life choices, please include them in the below comment section.
Hmm totally relate-able. I feel the same way but with less traveling under my belt and less nesting pressure. But I do feel a big tension between finding somewhere to live somewhat permanently and getting involved in my community or setting off to wander the world an strong, independent, eternally single explorer. But you shouldn't see them as two options. Who says you have to suburbanize your life? Couples (and families such as my own)roam the world all the time. They just aren't the norm, and you don't meet them because they are too busy with said exploring. My parent did off the beaten path india with myself (at 5 yrs), my middle brother in a stroller, and a growing fetus that would become my youngest brother.
ReplyDeleteI think your childhood sounds awesome! My family took a vacation once a year when I was younger, but that kind of ended after high school. Now, I make it a priority to travel on my own. Seriously, all I think about is my next adventure.
ReplyDeleteSocietal pressure and my self-determination can be quite conflicting ideas. On one hand, I compare myself to my friends who have created a little family. On the other hand, it's difficult to picture myself having their life. I know there isn't one "right" path in life, but at this point I'm not sure which road to travel. Then again, maybe I'm creating this tension all on my own and I should just see where life takes me.
P.S. I think life as a strong, independent, eternally single explorer seems like an awesome idea. I TOTALLY support it!!!
I love you Amber. It's soooo nice to know someone else feels nearly the exact same thing I do!! :-D
ReplyDeleteI hope we never get too old to be nomadic, because that's in my plans too!!
LOL, and I maintain that I'm a grown-up. I pay my bills on time and all that responsibility crap. But just because we're "grown-up" doesn't mean we have to be boring...um, i mean, settled down into a domestic situation. :-) At least that's what I'm trying to explain to my mom that is visiting this weekend....ha.
Remember, one girl's greatest dream can be another girl's worst nightmare.
You are right! I am a grown-up. I pay bills; I have a positive net worth; I contribute to my retirement funds. I'm responsible. The domestic life is so scary. It seems so....monotonous. That really freaks me out.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad that you understand my "central-American" roots, but also appreciates that world outside of the Central Time Zone.