Signs of aging

As you know, dear reader, the impending doom of 30 is rapidly approaching.  It’s already late-May, and I have less than 7 months to live up my 20s. 

Getting older is, no doubt, inescapable.  There are, however, vivid signs of my age that have slowly crept up me like growing ivy. 

·         My savings accounts are always on my mind.

·         I own spanx.

·         My body flattens when I lay down.

·         I will only buy comfortable, functional shoes.

·         There is something wrong with my left knee.

·         No matter how much I sleep, I still feel tired in the morning.

·         I don’t like to drive at night anymore.

·         It takes forever to get over a cold.

·         It makes me happy to see that other people from high school have gained weight too.

·         IF I get into a swimsuit, it’s a one-piece.  If I ever have enough courage to wear a two-piece again, it’ll probably be a tankini with a skirt.

·         I think no one should make major life decisions until they turn 30.  (Major life decisions = buying a house, getting married, procreating, etc.)

·         I wash my hand much more often that I ever used to.

·         My back hurts when I stand at the sink.

·         No matter what I eat, I’m going to need a Tums. 

·         I’m still mad that high school wasn’t like 90210 or Saved by the Bell.

·         I spend the extra money for transition lenses.

·         I can never tell if I’m bloated or just chubby.

·         I’m in my jam-jams by 8pm.

·         Dress pants without creases bother me.

·         Your friends start having kids on purpose.

·         I always confirm my plans and appointments.

·         My grandmother and I have long discussions about the crossword.

·         I’m not fully convinced that I’m a grown-up, even though I’ve been doing it all on my own for over 10 years.

·         I have to pee in the middle of the night, sometimes more than once.  And then I need another Tums. 

Pretending to be an adult is quite exhausting. 

6 more months of BLOGGING

Can you believe I’ve been blogging for 18 months???

It’s been kind of a slow 6 months.  Maybe because it was winter or maybe because I’m lazy, but I feel like I haven’t done as much as I did in my first 6 month and 1 year blog.  

Let’s look at what I’ve done.

• Went to a painting class
• Saw Stephen Colbert
• Went to a Ross King lecture
• Spent Thanksgiving with my sister  (We had Chinese.)
• Went to a couple Wizards games
• Spent a day in Florida for a wedding
• Toured the White House to see their Christmas decorations
• Hiked
• Played a season of winter volleyball
• Started my 101 in 1001 project
• Saw Susan Cain
• Went to a Blackberry Smoke Concert
• Took a blogging class
• Saw General McChrystal speak
• Hiked more
• Went skiing
• Went snowshoeing
• Climbed Mt. Washington
• Visited two new states: Vermont and New Hampshire
• Went to the Ben and Jerry’s factory
• Went to a Jodi Picoult event
• Went to a Sheryl Sandberg event
• Took (another) painting class
• Saw Sandra Day O’Connor speak
• Went to a USS Cole event
• Saw Luke Bryan in concert
• Started playing spring softball
• Started playing spring football
• Went to a movie at the DC International Film Festival
• Stopped tutoring
• Applied to grad school
• Cut off 14 inches of my hair and donated the hair to Locks of Love
• Went to a Cinco de Mayo party

I am working very hard on my 101 in 1001 project. I’m currently 10% finished, and I have 898 days left.  I feel like I’m going to get a lot done this summer - the planning has already begun.  

Overall though, I don’t feel like this list is long or robust.  This only inspires me to have a more active summer!!!  

Have you done anything fun over the last 6 months???

Making my Life Significant

As someone who has taken the “road less traveled” in my short life, I’m, again, re-thinking everything: my career, my location, my purpose.  Remember how I just posted about my Quarter Life Crisis?  Well, I still have no answers, but I refuse to stop conversing about this important topic.

I graduated from college at age 28 and immediately found a job at a prestigious-sounding government agency.  I make great money if you live in the Midwest, and I make just enough to get by in Washington DC.  My job is super boring, but I work with wonderful people and when I leave at 4:30pm, I leave it all at work.  I have a good life.

I shouldn’t be complaining. 

But I am.

I look around and think, “None of this matters.”  My job doesn’t matter.  Half of the work my department – or at least my little division within the larger department – handles doesn’t matter.  My boss’ overly stressed approach is unnecessary.  The Blackberry mentality is ridiculous.  Yard work doesn’t matter.  Fancy clothes don’t matter.  Traffic doesn’t matter.  Everything just seems so….insignificant.

Do you know what’s isn’t insignificant though??? 

EATING

PAYING YOUR BILLS

LIVING A DEBT-FREE LIFE

TRAVELING

SAVING FOR RETIREMENT

I feel like I’m settling for a job that pays the bills because that’s what I’m “supposed” to do.  

I feel like I’m settling in my life.  Then I get mad at myself for allowing this to happen.  I’m starting to think, “Geez...GET YOURSELF TOGETHER!”

I guess there is a larger question – how do you balance the bills and the boring part with something fun and fulfilling?  I guess I could find a job that both pays the bills and is fulfilling, but seriously…..where are those jobs posted??  And how much do they pay???

If I had it my way, I would be a travel blogger.  Or a park ranger.  Or a hiker.  Or life coach.  Or Kenyan mud-house builder.  Yes, I’m serious about all of these options.  I would also make 80K a year.  (Why won’t someone pay me to hike the Appalachian Trail???)  

I want so badly to do something amazing.  But I have a big secret that is preventing me from getting too far outside of my comfort zone.

This is the secret: I’m too scared.  I’m too scared to quit my job and backpack across Asia.  (Although, I’m not sure which gives me more anxiety.)  I'm too scared to go to culinary school or get a MFA because I feel like I should get a Master's degree in a subject that will further my career.  

The below quote is from Dear Sugar, which I have taped to my cubicle wall at work.  I think this is the way we should all begin living our lives.  Her words really put my life into perspective.  I will keep looking for something amazing.  I will keep my vulnerabilities surfaced and contemplate my fears.  But most of all, I will continue to weigh all of my options.  

What are you going to do???

"You don’t have to get a job that makes others feel comfortable about what they perceive as your success. You don’t have to explain what you plan to do with your life. You don’t have to justify your education by demonstrating its financial rewards. You don’t have to maintain an impeccable credit score. Anyone who expects you to do any of those things has no sense of history or economics or science or the arts.

You have to pay your own electric bill. You have to be kind. You have to give it all you got. You have to find people who love you truly and love them back with the same truth.

But that’s all."